Have you
ever wondered if a door was truly opening or whether it was just another shiny
thing appearing before you, teasing you?
Sometimes
we want something so much that it can be difficult to decide whether the perceived
opening is really something we should pay attention to or whether it is a
distraction from our journey.
When our “wants” are so strong, we oftentimes confuse the two.
It takes
patience and focus to stop and ask yourself if this is what is meant for you at
this moment.
On the road through experience, I can attest to wasting years following pursuits I thought were meant for me. I went down rabbit holes, chasing the shiny thing only to admit too late that I was led by something other than what was going to support me on my journey.
Likewise, there have been times I missed an open-door opportunity due to fear or uncertainty that I had the skill or ability. Fear drove many of my decisions to hold back and stay in my comfort zone. Timing is everything.
This week
we lost a very dear friend – suddenly. It is one of those deaths that stopped
us in our tracks, made our hearts skip a beat, and rendered us without words. Time
stood still for a brief moment.
This loss has given me pause; I’ve wondered how much time I’ve wasted pursuing opportunities that were never for me. Worse yet, how many opportunities slipped through my fingers because I was afraid or because I didn’t believe in myself? Timing is everything.
Without
the certainty that we’re going to have tomorrow, it’s important to be certain
of our path, our calling, the direction we want our life to follow so that we can
make the most of the time we do have.
Our
choices today have a direct effect on our life tomorrow. Today we are as blessed
as we’ll ever be. That is something I whisper to myself every day.
When you’re trying to understand who you are and what your purpose is, walking through the right doors at the right time is serious business and shouldn’t be taken lightly. Timing is everything.
Through
this tragedy of loss, I am more committed to live my life happily, to love
without holding back, to eliminate negative people and negative situations from
my life, to minimize my time on social media, to look up more, to sing and
dance more, to read more, and to put my bare feet on the earth as often as I
can.
In times of strife, I hope I can remember to ask myself “what would water do?” Water finds its way around obstacles and can either be powerful or soft. It can take on the form of a solid, liquid, or gas. I hope my answer is be humble, be in harmony with what is around me, and be open to shaping myself to the situation I’m in.
Timing is everything. What will you do with your life today?
You are enough. How often do we tell ourselves that we are
enough? What does “enough” mean?
It doesn’t mean you are complete, finished, that
you have accomplished everything you wanted, that you are done with learning,
growing, and expanding your horizons, evolving your thoughts.
It doesn’t mean you
are perfect, flawless, omnipotent, and powerful. It doesn’t mean you are everything
to everyone.
It simply means you are enough, as you are right now, in the
place you are, just as the Creator made you to be. You don’t have to do
anything else to earn the label of “enough.” It is so right now.
When you can hold “I am
enough” in your heart and mind you can push through doubts that bubble up
when you make a mistake, or need help, or fail at something. You know being
“enough” doesn’t mean world events will go your way and you’ll get everything
you want.
It
doesn’t mean you don’t need people,
experiences, or things. It simply means you are grateful for what you have and
can acknowledge all that you have right where you are, right now.
It means you know your
flaws, weaknesses, and imperfections are not a reflection of your value and
worth but simply a reflection of your humanness. They are all just a part of
your story and your journey.
When others call you
out on their perception of your flaws and imperfections it doesn’t mean their
observations are necessarily true because you know what you’re working on every
day. Their words may sting but because you are holding “I am enough” in your
heart, you can move past the sting. You will continue being you, flaws and all.
When
you were born, you were enough then and you are enough now. You were a perfect
little human being then and you are enough now. You were a reason to smile
then, and you are reason enough to smile now. You were enough in every way
then, and you are enough now. You didn’t have
to prove yourself then and you don’t have to prove yourself now.
Does
this all mean you shouldn’t be more of something? Absolutely not. I want to be
more intentional, more loving, more present, more expressive, more flexible,
more playful, more grateful. But knowing “I am enough” says I no longer work at
trying to be more worthy in someone else’s life, or more loved, or more needed.
That is their issue. I am already all those things right here, right now. I am
already me – beautiful, imperfect, broken, mended, a child of the most high
God, me.
Whatever you choose
for you is right. You cannot get it wrong. You cannot fail at being you because
nobody else can be you. You are enough. You have you down perfectly. You are
enough. Appreciate that you are an outstanding and complete success at being
you. You are enough.
So, keep getting up,
getting dressed, and showing up in your life every day. That’s it…that’s all
you must do.
You were enough
before, you are enough now, and you will continue to be enough as you become
more of who you were made to be.
Here’s Why We Don’t Always Take Steps Toward Success…
Can I be honest with you? We all know we need motivation to stick with our goals. But with busy lives, we may not always take the steps we know will bring us success. That’s why we need others — friends, colleagues, and personal accountability partners — to help us stay on track. So recently, I’ve taken the unusual step of building what I think is the ultimate tool for keeping you constantly in action toward achieving the life of your dreams.
It’s a community of like-minded people from around the world who are doing exciting things with their lives—or want to! It’s a global movement of abundant thinkers who’ve been grounded in living some pretty clear-cut principles of success.
When you decide to join us, it’s like being accepted into a uniquely powerful club — an inner circle of friends and contacts — without the rigorous membership requirements. Best of all, it’s completely FREE to join and starts on Monday, February 18th.
What Can You Expect
To get you started — and challenge you a bit — I’ve prepared a free 14-Day Workbook with simple assignments designed to keep you focused on your goals, while you uplevel every area of your life.
Over the next 14 days, you’ll:
– Finally resolve long-standing troubling situations and move forward without stress- – Become proactive about your future, instead of blaming and complaining – Respond differently to unexpected disasters and unexpected opportunities – Master the #1 habit that top achievers use to stay focused (hint: it’s not time management or a 3×5 card)
The 14-Day Challenge Workbook I’ve prepared is included FREE when you become part of my inner circle online.
Meet new friends, swap stories, share your biggest wins, participate in guided discussions. You never know who you’ll meet in this amazing new online community — or what they’ll mean to your future!
Use this link to join the Facebook group and begin to take control of your life!!!
This is going to be a great year! I feel it in my soul. I have begun the year doing something I’ve never done before. This is a practice I’ve seen floating around the internet for a few years, so the idea isn’t mine and I don’t take credit for it. I don’t know it’s originator, but I thank him or her because it’s a beautiful idea.
Here’s how it works…pick any three words that guide you forward to success in the coming year. Write these words down on a sheet of paper that you refer to everyday (or you can write them down every day). Keep them posted wherever they are visible to you frequently throughout the day – your mobile device screensaver, your computer monitor, a sticky note in your car, taped to your bathroom mirror, etc. Schedule a daily appointment with yourself in which you sit quietly and simply reflect on the three words you’ve chosen.
You’re manifesting in your own lane so pick 3 words that mean something to you. It’s important to pick words that you “feel.” You want words that will move you into alignment with what you want to accomplish this year. Action words are great because they inspire you to “do” something but if your word is a noun and it’s the right word for you, go with it. My words for 2019 are all nouns.
My 3 Words…
Rituals – I discovered a couple of years ago that when I begin my day with certain rituals I am happier throughout the day. In 2018, I allowed other things to crash in on my early morning rituals but not this year!
Home – my home is the most important place to me. It’s where I find balance. It centers me. From here I can look out onto the messiness of the world and still be okay. This year I want to accomplish some changes in our home that have been put off for awhile. These aren’t just simply chores, but other things that keep our home our happy place.
Relationships – both my personal and professional life is about relationships. Relationships come and go in life. I am going to focus this year on cultivating new relationships and strengthening the ones I have.
So now it’s your turn. Make 2019 a success! You have the power.
It’s the beginning of a new year, and you’re super fired up about it. This is THE YEAR you’re going to make positive changes in your life. Nothing will stand in your way. I hope these quotes help you to find wisdom and be motivated each and every day this month.
January 1, 2019
Today is the first day of the rest of your life.
January 2, 2019
Be present for this moment right now.
January 3, 2019
Began each day with gratitude and watch your energy shift.
January 4, 2019
Find your funny bone.
January 5, 2019
If the people in your life don’t inspire you, uplift you, support you then find new people.
January 6, 2019
Studies show that just 10 minutes of mindfulness each day can give you a positive boost.
January 7, 2019
Look for something good in everything…even if you have to look a little harder.
January 8, 2019
Sometimes when life feels like it’s falling apart, it is really falling into place.
January 9, 2019
If you made an agreement with yourself, stick with it.
January 10, 2019
You have been given so much – be generous and share with others.
January 11, 2019
We all live in glass houses and no one has clean windows. Stay true to who you know you are and don’t let the opinions or judgement of others drag you down.
January 12, 2019
Just a reminder…
January 13, 2019
You know the truth by the way it feels.
January 14, 2019
Wish them well and keep moving forward.
January 15, 2019
Escape the cage, spread your wings, and fly!
January 16, 2019
Breathe…
January 17, 2019
This is the beginning of anything you want.
January 18, 2019
Not everyone will understand your journey. They’re not supposed to – it’s yours.
January 19, 2019
Don’t take another person’s judgement of you to heart. It doesn’t matter. What matters is what you think of yourself.
January 20, 2019
If you can remain kind in the face of someone who is being mean, you won.
January 21, 2019
Fill your heart and life with what’s important and leave the rest alone.
January 22, 2019
What you believe about yourself is more important than what others think of you.
January 23, 2019
You are becoming more awesomer every day!
January 24, 2019
Even broken crayons can still color.
January 25, 2019
It’s your choice. It’s not a waste of time if you learned something.
January 26, 2019
You never look good trying to make someone else look bad. Choose to speak lovingly and uplift others.
January 27, 2019
Better things are coming your way!
January 28, 2019
Be the star in your life and call your own directions.
January 29, 2019
Don’t play victim to circumstances you created. You are 100% responsible for your life.
January 30, 2019
You are lovable and amazing.
January 31, 2019
The Universe will wreck your plans when your plans are about to wreck you.
Being a woman from the South, we’re taught at a young age that telling our true age just isn’t done. I have often aligned myself in this manner with Blanche Devereaux (Golden Girls Rue McClanahan character if you have NO idea who I’m talking about – you can Google her). But, I’m going to break that rule and just lay it out there – I turned 57 recently. There, I said it, and all is still good in my world. The sky didn’t crash down on me. Since my 55th birthday, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking and a lot of reflecting on my life. I’ve learned not to look backwards because it’s back there and there’s nothing new my past can tell me. If I could change anything of the past, I wish that my future self could have transported back to that earlier time and shared some pieces of advice that just might have resulted in me making a few different choices. For the most part, I would tell my younger self to stay single longer. I would tell her that there is a fullness to single life that should be embraced daily. There is something pretty nice about being responsible for no one but oneself. I would also tell my younger self not to get caught up in the comparison game and remember to love me every day no.matter.what. Social media has taken the comparison game to a whole different level! I would remind myself to tell the image looking back at me that I love her. Perspective is important, and the little stuff isn’t. The key though, is figuring out what the little stuff is. Here are a few other things I would say to myself:
1. You are beautiful.
Ahhh….the comparison game. Why her? Why is she prettier, skinnier, has clearer skin, (feel free to insert your “why her” questions here)? I would tell my younger self that she is also asking herself the same questions of someone else, perhaps even comparing herself to me. The point is even though you might feel unattractive and blah you actually look amazing! I look back at pictures of my younger self and think “Wow! I was beautiful! Why didn’t I see that then?!?!”
By my late 40s I had to wait 5 minutes for my behind to make it through a door before it could be closed. Well, not really, but the point is, I could no longer eat a basket of chips with queso without feeling it in my pants waistline. And those low riding jeans (we used to call them “hip huggers” in the day!) forget it! No one wants to see my backside! I am convinced that my closet hates me and consistently shrinks my clothes when the light goes off. To stay anywhere close to my teen and 20’s weight I would tell my younger self that I’m going to need to move a little more, eat a little less, and eat foods that don’t come in a package or can be bought from the driver’s seat of my car. At the same time, enjoy life, eat the cupcake! I would tell my younger self to see the mirror as a friend. I would tell my younger self that I am amazing. I would tell my younger self not to criticize this amazing creature of God looking back at me. Tell yourself every day that you love yourself and don’t take you for granted! I’m not kidding – look in the mirror and give yourself some mirror love.
2. Believe in yourself.
I spent an enormous amount of my life with limiting beliefs about what I could and couldn’t do. If I could talk to my younger self, I would tell her “Your beliefs are your choice so make the choice to believe in yourself no matter what anyone else says.” The Universe is open to you. Your wish is its command. Believe you deserve it and the Universe will serve it up. You gotta believe that you can accomplish anything you set your mind to. Even if you don’t know “how,” take steps toward your goals and the requirements will be met. Resources will show up and ideas will come to you. It may take you some time to figure out your purpose on this earth but you gotta start somewhere. If money and time were not factors, what is the biggest dream you have? What do you want to be, do, or have? Put your hand on your heart and ask yourself what you want. Your heart knows the way – run in that direction. Go on, stop reading for a minute, think about it, and then write it down. One of the reasons most people aren’t living their best life is that they haven’t decided what they want OR they flood themselves with limiting beliefs. The first thing that comes to your mind is always the right thing. Don’t live someone else’s dreams. Don’t become numb to your own desires. Start on the most basic level and honor your preferences in every situation no matter the size of the preference. Once I figured out how to get out of my own way the best thing I’ve ever done is to believe in myself. Believe in yourself!
3. Be your own best friend.
My younger self had a lot of friends and that was way before the days of selfies and the like. In my 20s and 30s and since then, my circle of friends was and is much smaller. It used to bother me. What happened? Nothing really – just life, jobs, families, kids, the usual. In today’s world, if I rely on social media to gauge anyone’s popularity, getting “likes” and having many “followers” is seen as a benchmark for success and popularity. But I don’t think so. Having friends is important. Connections and networks are important. It’s good to have people in your life who cheer for you, guide you, and give you advice but you must be willing to encourage yourself and be your own best friend so that you can keep the momentum going when the “likes and followers” are silent. The only person who will be with you for all your life, all the time, is YOU! The most important thing I would tell my younger self is to fill life with experiences, not things, and have stories to tell, not stuff to show. Life goes by so fast.
4. Keep your independence, even if you’re in a committed relationship.
Being single is great! It’s the only time in your life when you can do exactly what you want to do without checking in, compromising, or making concessions. You can eat an entire box of macaroni and cheese right out of the pan without guilt. You can flirt with whomever you want. You can go for days without putting makeup on…and those pajamas you’ve been in for three days? You are rocking them! So, enjoy your singleness as long as you can stand it.
For me, being married to the right person (“wasbands” #1 and #2 weren’t the right people) is awesome. Even though it took three attempts, I finally got it right and I LOVE being married! Togetherness and friendship with a spouse is a blessing that can’t be matched. But I love my space too. When he goes away on a fishing trip, I like (and sometimes dislike) the quietness of the house. One of the first things I do is clean and then I spend the remainder of his absence swirling around in it. Nothing to pick up, nothing to hang up for the rest of his absence. The other thing I do is sleep in the middle of the bed – it’s mine, all mine! And then, I don’t sleep well because he’s not there. Tradeoffs. Even though I love being married, I also crave quiet time when we’re together and sometimes that is harder to come by. Tradeoffs. When my quiet time is interrupted, I remind myself that there will be a day when I will miss the interruptions and then I turn to him with a smile (most of the time). As you get older your priorities shift. Commitment is a precious gift but don’t forget to love the person looking back at you in the mirror. Take time daily to be with you. Your future self will love you for the habit you’re building.
5. Adopt smart and healthy habits.
I have already lived longer than my older brother did. He lost a battle with melanoma, so it goes without saying that I would tell my younger self to adopt the habit of wearing sunscreen, a hat, sunglasses, and long sleeves (really? in the summer heat?). I would also tell my younger self to establish a powerful morning routine and work out regularly. It’s taken a while for me to get where I am now, but I spend the first hour of every morning in prayer/Bible study, meditation, and reading something uplifting and inspirational. I don’t look at the news – what’s the point? And, then I exercise – weights/light cardio 2x/week and intense cardio 4x/week – Sunday is a day of rest and family/friendship time. It takes discipline and dedication to develop healthy goals and make them habits. So, I would also tell my younger self that it’s important to keep your agreements, especially with yourself. I promise that once you establish healthy habits, you’ll see the immediate impact on a day that you miss doing something.
6. Manage your finances.
I was blessed to be raised by parents who were good with managing money, even though there never seemed to be enough of it (that’s one point of being good with managing it, right?). They raised a family of 4 children on my Dad’s military salary. Mama stayed at home for a large portion of my childhood. She also taught me how to balance a checkbook and grocery shop on a budget. My parent’s instruction was so valuable that I bought my first home when I was 22. I learned very early that it’s important to say “NO” to spending beyond your means! Spending every cent you have is a huge mistake and being in debt is an even bigger one. I began saving my money when I received my first paycheck at the age of 13. If you begin to save even the seemingly small amount of $10/week in your twenties, you can retire as a wealthy person in your 60s. Whether you realize it or not, there are consequences to spending more than you can afford and not living on a budget. Unless you’re a trust fund baby (and most of us are not) you could find yourself in a financial hole that is hard to dig out of. Pay yourself first, and then pay the government, tithe, donate to a cause, pay your bills, and finally have some fun with what is left over. There are many fun things you can do that cost little to nothing.
7. Always be humble and kind.
That’s the title to a country music song and it is something I wish my younger self had done a better job of accomplishing. I wasn’t always humble or kind. Oh, if I could pull back the words and actions that hurt others. If I could undo it all I would. What we give we get, and for every unkind word or egoistic action I took, I received the same and it hurt. My younger self was so full of ego and what a waste! The good news is that my older self has forgiven me. I found the strength to open up and make peace with my past self. What I know now that I wish my younger self had known is that there is enough to go around. It doesn’t cost anything to be kind. C. S. Lewis said “Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it is thinking of yourself less.” I like that.
*—* —*—*—*—*—*
When I think back on my younger self, I know I had some great experiences, made a few mistakes and choices, but I grew into a person that I am proud of. Pretty neat, I’d say!
